Man…it’s been a while since I’ve written one of these!

I totally wish I had friends like this.  About 20/30 minutes into the movie Bleed, the lead character Shawn (Danny Wolske) takes new girlfriend Maddy (Debbie Rochon) to meet his friends for a pool party, but they get there a little late.  Tillie (Orly Tepper), the party host, says “you’re not late, because no one’s naked!”  Everyone has a good laugh, but she meant it!  Apparently all of Shawn’s friends are beautiful 20-somethings that like to have naked pool parties.  Do people like this exist? If so, talkback below!

Okay, now that I’m past that, let’s talk a little bit about the actual film.  Remember how much I like to talk about Full Moon Pictures, the company behind the Puppet Master and Subspecies series?  Well, one of their biggest supporters is Blockbuster Entertainment, who have actually frequently met with Full Moon to help in establishing what titles are good renters, and what titles they think customers would like to see.  That’s actually how we got the genius that is…Evil Bong.  Anyway, they asked Full Moon to produce a straight slasher film, since, at the time, the late 90’s was seeing a boom in the slasher genre thanks to Scream.

Bleed came out in 2002 direct to DVD, and is about Shawn, who has some kind of desk job that allows him to hang Full Moon posters in the hallway and apparently do nothing all day other than talk to hot chicks.  Pretty sure it’s not pivotal to the storyline, but I would have liked to have known what the hell his job was – not sure they ever say.  Anyway, a new girl named Maddy is starting the job, and Shawn starts hitting on her instantly.  Apparently, they don’t have a sexual harrassment policy at his workplace.

Check after the jump for the rest of the review.

Before I realized that Maddy was played by Debbie Rochon, I thought she looked like one of those horror movie main actresses that you always want to get naked, but they never do.  My fears were quickly subsided though when, on her first date with Shawn, they make with the lovin’.  When she starts talking to Shawn about how special the night was for her and all, I expected him to fire her, then never call her again.  Alas, apparently he liked her, because he invites her to the aforementioned naked pool party.

After the pool party, Shawn, Maddy, and the rest of the gang are hanging out in the hot tub (fully clothed, oddly enough) and Shawn’s friend Chris (Allen Nabours) starts talking about the group’s ‘murder club’. Basically, they take turns murdering people, and the group covers for them with alibis.  Totally need these friends, right?

Anyway, Maddy is all upset (probably shoulda waited till the third date to spring that one on her) and goes home alone that night.  Thing is, since moving to the area, she’s been plagued with nightmares about murders.  Later that night, Karen and Keith (a couple at the party) are murdered by a masked killer. Maddy, still upset about her nightmares and about her boyfriend being, you know, a psychopath, ends up getting into an argument in a shopping garage with a girl who hit her car with her car door.  Well, as we all do from time to time, Maddy bashes the girl’s head in, then decides that since Shawn is apparently awesome in the sack or something, she now has initiated herself into the murder club.

Problem is…Chris and Shawn were just messing with her.  There isn’t a murder club.  But Shawn doesn’t want to turn Maddy into the police, so a makeshift one is formed to cover her tracks.  All the while, someone is murdering people in the group.

You know, Bleed isn’t half bad.  The cover of the box is one of those generic 90’s slasher covers, with the floating heads, so I really just kind of expected a low budget Scream/I Know What You Did Last Summer.  But the idea of the murder club, and the way the storyline turns after Maddy’s committed a murder of her own, were actually pretty different and well done.  The acting wasn’t too horrible (there were a couple of stinkers in the group), and the leads, Debbie Rochon and Danny Wolske, actually had decent chemistry.

I wasn’t bored at all, and was actually fairly entertained.  The identity of the killer is a bit predictable, but the ending actually was pretty well done, and a nice bit of dark humor.

I mean, of course the film isn’t perfect – it’s lack of budget shows, the gore effects really weren’t too hot, and the holes in the plotline (why was Maddy having nightmares that were EXACTLY like the murders?) are never really addressed.  Plus, the idea of a group of hot 20-somethings hanging out together naked was a bit hard to swallow.  Still, is it any harder to swallow than a group of high school kids watching the original Halloween during a party in the original Scream?  Or the fact that they invited the nerdy guy that no one likes?  Probably not.

Check out Bleed when you get the chance, and if you’re looking for something different in your slasher flick.  Looks like only used copies are available on Amazon, but they’re cheaper than renting it!

Paul’s Awesomeness Score – 6 out of 10!