Ya know, I just can’t bring myself to write a long review of 51, another entry in the new series of After Dark Originals that had a recent premiere on SyFy Channel.  Unlike the first entry, Husk (review here), which was pretty damn great, 51 feels like what you’d expect to premiere on Saturday night on the SyFy Channel.  I really expected a Mega Shark or a Croctopus or whatever the hell to show up at any moment in all tv-level CGI glory.  Yes…it’s that bad.

Starring a tv-level cast including Bruce Boxleitner, Rachel Miner, Jason London, and John Shea, and directed by Jason Connery (who also directed a pretty crappy flick called The Devil’s Tomb), 51 has tv-level everything … production values, acting, special effects and writing.  I think the only one who comes out of the flick relatively unscathed is Boxleitner, and maybe that’s just because, no matter how many people love the guy (present company included), I don’t think we really expect too much out of him to begin with.

So what’s it about?  Well, the government has allowed a group of reporters “exclusive” access to Area 51, with the intent of making people think that there are no actual aliens there.  But then the aliens get out (duh) and there’s a midget alien, and a shapeshifting alien AND a Giger-esque alien … all in one movie!  Of course, by just throwing every cool thing you’ve ever seen in an alien movie, you end up not having any real rules, and just leaving your audience feeling like you’re making it up as you go along … hell, they probably were.  Skip this piece of crap.

Paul's Awesomeness Score - 1 out of 10!